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Friends list Vs Contacts list

Friends have always been an integral part of my life. But recently, I did a stock check and found out that my friends list is starting to deplete. Well, Is that normal? Does it happen to all working human after certain period of time?

My friends list has been always increasing and it spans from Kinder-garden mates through college till workplace. The tertiary branch of the list are sourced from Friends of friends, neighbours, co-passengers, business contacts, etc… The list on its own has never decreased, but the number of people with whom I maintain proximity contact and communicative contact has drastically come down. Even when there was no email or mobile, I managed to keep in touch with many of my friends. But now, there is mobile, social networks, email, etc.. but yet I don’t find time and the enthusiasm to be in touch with most of them.

I do have contacts with some of the friends, but those are friends who forcefully maintain contact with me. Though I seldom ping them, a handful of friends contact me and keep the connection alive. I am really grateful to such friends. On the other hand, friends whom I had contacts with earlier, wait for me to give them a call and when they don’t get it, they assume that I no more wish to be in touch with them. But that’s not the case. I do want to be in touch with all and show off my huge circle of friends. But certain factors limit me.

First in line is the delimiter that I am still an eligible bachelor and most of my friends have exchanged vows. I do sincerely want them to spend time with their family rather than catching up with friends and spending time. A bunch of these lot have delivered off-springs and that too cute ones… So obviously their work/life balance would be really reach to maintain.

The unmarried bachelors are all in their peak of their careers and frantically searching for some breakthrough to settle down, (So am I). Most of us spend hard and long hours at office and spend the weekends trying to get some rest. Almost all of us don’t stay at home town. So weekends are travelling times.

Proximity at city levels is another great factor. Most of my friends are scattered across the globe and if not, they are in travel mode most of the times.

But yeah! I could come up with more and more reasons to justify my crime of not being in touch with most of them.

Top 5 reason I could come up with…

Social network:
Friend: hey why dont you scrap or poke me?
Me: Dude, social networks are for those who don’t have actual social life.

Friend: Atleast why dont you mail me?
Me: I mailed you a couple of time, but your mail box bounced back my mails.

Friend: What happend to your series of forwards?
Me: I sprained my thumb. Doctors adviced me not to Text anymore.

Friend: Why don’t you call me once in a while?
Me: I tried, but your phone was switched off
Me: I lost my mobile along with ur number
Me: Do you have a mobile? I didn’t know that…

When in town:
Friend: You should have called me. We could have met up.
Me: Were you in town too? Jesus! Did I miss the oppurtunity.

Well, as I said, I could come up with many more reasons for not being in touch. But I sincerely hope that I find one reason to find the enthusiasm to be in touch. After all, my company will find a replacement if I quit, but my friends won’t find another Giri, if I shut down on them.

p.s: Thanks to Gowri, Loga, Rohit, Muthu, Praveen(s), Dilip, Kali, Kannapan, Silviya, Sowmya, Karthi, Preetha, Bala and a few more friends who make it a point to force me to be in touch with them. Others… read the confessions above…


3 responses

  1. Hey da, very nice post! Ironically in the “IT age” we are more distant from our friends and loved ones than we were during the medieval times. I also went through my contact list yesterday and found that half of the guys/gals have left town in search of better career prospects or got married. The other off is either not reachable or “busy” the time I call them :-)

    Such is Man follies!…

    April 16, 2008 at 5:46 PM

  2. Hey! First off love the blog’s new look. I know I saw it earlier, didn’t get a chance to comment tho. Like what you’ve done with the place, in posts and the whole look of it. esp the orange couch. Very inviting, very Ikea, very me :)

    Now the post. So, you are the one who aren’t in touch? :O
    Okay, I just have one simple sentence for you.
    Do what you feel comes from your heart, duty and need. In that order. Let’s not step into other’s shoes and think things for them.
    The world cannot get anymore connected than now. Seriously. I graduated when the net wasn’t around, so tracking my folks down esp considering we aren’t ITis hard. Now finding someone to say a quick hi, or hey how u doing is just a google search, forums, networks whatever.

    Of course, you should feel and WANT to follow up on the thought, if not, then it’s all okay :)
    I shall stop now. Its early morning and caffeine-free rambles can get serious :P

    April 27, 2008 at 5:59 PM

  3. Giridhar

    Thanks for the comments on the new look. Guess its the first one i receive on the look and feel, ever since i changed it.. :-)
    Ya there is always time and we can always find it.. thats why i wished for the enthusiasm to stay in touch and I don’t to be robotized due to work.

    April 28, 2008 at 7:45 PM

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